Wa-Wa

(This is second of four essays that I had been meaning to write about my Thailand/Malaysia trip. These were essays that were just too good to fire off quickly. And since I have a bit of free time, I thought I'd work on them. Hope you enjoy.)



I sink in a leather recliner with my feet up. Matilda is working on my toes. That's not her real name, but it helps me through the foot massage.

The recliner is in a massage parlor in Jalan Petaling. As this is my first full day in Malaysia, I have no idea what this area is like. I had spent a week all over Thailand prior to arriving; A week filled with foot massages. Glorious foot massages. My feet had never felt more alive. But this isn't Thailand, and Matilda is caressing my right heel. I close my eyes and sigh. This place isn't so bad. I get can used to another few days of this...

As I open my eyes, Matilda pauses to look up at me. She winks. That's odd. Is this Malaysian custom? Lonely Planet said nothing about the locals being this friendly. Matilda goes back to work. I steal a glance. To put it gently, she is not attractive. She should be pushing carts at dim sum. That doesn't matter. As long as she can make me feel at peace, I'm fine with this.

She stops working and stands. She spreads her arms wide open. "Full body!" She exclaims. She winks again. I'm concerned, but I'm too relaxed. Why give my feet all the pleasure? My back aches, my neck is stiff and my arms are tense. I nod my head. Full body, indeed.

Matilda leads me up a flight of stairs that creak with each step. She leads me into a dim room, separated by dividers. She gestures for me to take off my shirt. Really, my shirt? I don't remember doing this in Chiang Mai. Are you sure this is really necessary? Don't I just put on a robe or something? Matilda continues her gesturing, so off comes the shirt. She winks, and I start to crave shrimp dumplings.

After 15 minutes of rubbing my back, Matilda takes a step back and asks me to remove my shorts. Hold on. Now I KNOW this sort of thing didn't happenin Phuket. Matilda gestures some more. In the adjacent room, a man and a woman breathe heavily. My mind wanders. I feel a chill. Matilda has succeeded in removing my shorts. I don't even remember taking them off for her.

I feel a tug. Matilda is going for the briefs, but the money belt is preventing her. She laughs as she undos the belt. She kisses my ear and whispers, "Wa-wa?"

I snap out of my daze. Wa-wa? What the heck does that mean? Is she asking if I want a glass of water? Does she want an extra hour to massage me? Is she offering steamed buns? I freeze. I don't want to know what wa-wa is. Not now, not ever. I spill off the table as I pull up my briefs. "NO WA-WA! NO!"

Matilda stares back in horror. The heavy breathing next door has stopped. The entire parlor is silent. I fish for some ringgits in my money belt before fastening it back on. Matilda is confused. "No wa-wa?" She asks, as if nobody has ever refused her wa-wa. "No. I'm done." She shrugs and returns my sandals, along with a handful of grape chewy candies for my troubles.

I step out of the parlor, into the sunshine. I stop at an outdoor Chinese restaurant. I sit waiting for my fried rice, making a note to myself that if anyone should offer me wa-wa at some point, to run. Run like hell.

What This? (A Taste of Malaysia)

I had heard the food in Malaysia was fantastic. My primary goal was to try as many exotic foods as possible. Which is why my first meal was at the California Pizza Kitchen in Suria KLCC.



CPK in Malaysia tastes exactly like CPK in Los Angeles. I was shocked. You'd think that there'd be some variation on the Thai BBQ Chicken Pizza. Sadly, no.

The next day, while wandering KLCC (again), I found a breakfast place tucked away on the ground level of the mall. On display were several multi-colored pastries, each one crying out to me to choose them. I wanted to. I hadn't eaten all day. I waved to the woman at the counter, pointed to a neon-green pastry and asked, "What this?" I don't know why I spoke to her in broken English. It was a habit I picked up during my trip; asking questions, leaving out verbs, pointing a lot.

"Bingka," The woman answered. "Very sweet. Good!" I pointed at more dishes. "What this? What that one? Is good, yes?" She must have thought I was a monkey.

I picked two more dishes and a packet of rice, egg and anchovies wrapped in a banana leaf. I only chose it because other patrons were grabbing two at a time and giving me the stinkeye while I was took a whiff of the anchovies. I found out that the packet was a dish called nasi lemak, a Malaysian staple.



My entire meal cost $2 US. And it was fantastic.

If only I had found this before CPK...

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Bonus Tip: When you're in Malaysia, make sure to grab some Hainan Chicken Rice.



If this doesn't hit the spot, check your taste buds.

Malaysia: On the Tube

There wasn't a lot for me to do in KL.

My hotel was close to Suria KLCC, and if you're into shopping malls, that's a good thing.

So while there is plenty to see during the day, Kuala Lumpur's nightlife was lacking. I spent each night in the hotel, unwinding in front of tube. This may seem like a waste of vacation. And you may be right. But by this time, I was craving the comforts of home.



At 9 PM every night, one of the channels broadcasts live from an unnamed mosque. It's not exactly the 700 Club, but the call to prayer is mesmerizing. For about a minute.



Malaysia has its own version of So You Think You Can Dance? Does it compare to the US version? Hardly. All are decent enough dancers, but not a Katee nor Joshua to be found. However, there is no Malaysian Nigel nor Mary, and that's a good thing.



This is Edleen Ismail. She co-anchors the Malaysian version of SportsCenter on ESPN. If there is ANY way ESPN can move her stateside, I would be ever so grateful. If not, I may contemplate moving.

I doubt I will. I love American TV too much. However, if a Malaysian version of The Office comes on the air, then maybe. Just maybe.

Petrosains

If you asked me what the highlight of my stay in Kuala Lumpur was, I could say standing on the Skybridge between the Petronas Towers and catching a bird's-eye view of the city. But I wouldn't be honest with you.



My favorite part of KL lies inside the monstrous Suria KLCC shopping center on the top floor. Petrosains is an interactive science and discovery center. It's exhibits are geared toward children and anyone with a thirst for knowledge. Admission will cost you $4 US. It's a steal.



The great thing about Petrosains is that you get to be hands-on with all the exhibits. Ever wonder what it's like in the middle of a hurricane? Just step inside the Hurricane Booth! I'll let you in on a secret. It's a little windy.



There's a section of games that you can play to teach you principles of physics, geology and chemistry. One interesting game is MindBall. You and another person put on a headband which is attached to a machine with a ball inside. By using your brainpower, you can control the ball's movement. The first to push the ball across the other's goal line wins. It's a fascinating game. Too bad the kids playing wouldn't let me in. They were vicious.

Besides learning about science, you also get to know more about Petronas. The oil company's presence is felt throughout the exhibit. The bottom line: Petronas is awesome, and don't you forget it!

You can go on a simulated helicopter ride to one of Petronas' oil derricks in the middle of the ocean!



From there, you can experience what life is like on the derricks. I'll let you in on a secret. It's a little desolate. And the mannequins don't make it less so. But at least they eat well.

Remember, when you're in KL, make sure to check out Petrosains. It's a bargain, it will keep you cool from the Malaysian humidity and you might actually learn something.

Winding Down

It's my last night alone.

I return to Bangkok for a couple days with relatives, and then it's back home. I thought two weeks was enough for my trip. Not even close.

Physically, I'm toast. Though I've slept well, I've walked a lot. Taking in every sight, sound and smell drains you too. And with every waking thought being, "What do I do now?", the trip becomes less of a vacation.

I've racked up a bunch of pictures, videos, and most importantly, stories. This trip has produced an abundance of stories. I look forward to sharing them with you.

Cheers.

The Road to Southeast Asia: Prologue - The Big Boy Trip

Things happen for a reason.

I was supposed to leave for the Philippines in April, followed by a week in Thailand. I was all set to book my flights, when our trip fell through. I was crushed.

A month passed, and I was feeling it the itch. I sat at my desk at work, dreaming of Thai massages, when I thought, "Screw it, I'm just gonna go."

I was obsessed. I went on Kayak for a week straight, looking up flights till 2 AM. I mapped out my itinerary, scrapped it, made a new one, scrapped THAT, went back to my original plan, then went with Plan C.

Click. One flight booked. Click. There's another. Click. Wait, I need to book hotels! Click. Click. Click!!

And here I am, about to embark on a two-week solo trip to Southeast Asia.

This is my Big Boy Trip. No companions to lean on to do the dirty work. I have to ask for directions. I have to interact with the locals. I have to find my way across the mountains of Chiang Mai. I have to seek out the secluded beaches of Phuket on my own. I have to navigate the streets of KL. It's on me. This is the trip where I gut it out, suck it up, and go.

I will have friends and family in Bangkok to guide me. Apart from that, I am on my own. Two years ago, this was unthinkable. Today, it's all I think about. I want to approach this trip with open eyes. With boldness.

Enough writing.

Let's do this.



I'll be back in two weeks, with pictures, stories, and maybe even videos(!) to share. If I'm able, I will update.

Cheers.

Destination Next

Bangkok -> Chiang Mai -> Phuket -> KL

June 29 - July 13, 2008

It's on.